7-20-10

Mood: confused.

I just watched Remember Me. I thought it was amazing. Why did I have to watch it though? It hurt. From the first scene til the very end. As soon as he came on the screen I thought of you. The way he moved, the way he talked, the facial expressions. All of it. Even where he had a tattoo. I've actually been doing better lately. I've been happy, or atleast okay. As soon as things start to perk up, something reminds me of you. I even met someone else but I can't bring myself to do anything about it because of you. Worst of all, you don't care. You don't care one bit and there's no way I could ever make you care. I sound like a broken record and you'll never listen. You'll never listen to anyone. You're a child and you need to just grow up. Get over yourself. Be a man. Stop playing the victim and take responsibility for yourself and your actions. Stop letting your pride get in the way and admit that you're wrong. You know the people that truly love you and care about you will be here no matter what so what are you so scared of? I wish I knew how to make you listen. I'm only kidding myself. I'm trapped in this never ending cycle of regret and I know that regretting gets me nowhere. I can't change what happened and I can't go back in time. If I could go back, I don't even know what I'd change except maybe myself. I'd cherish the moments more and I'd pray they wouldn't end.

Quote of the day: "This is the memory. This is the curse of having too much time to think about it. It's killing me. This is the last time. This is my forgiveness. This is endless. This is endless."